Love and control — it’s unusual to associate the two of them. But the truth is, we often mistake one for the other.
All of us spent most of our childhood learning how to take care of things. We learned to take special care of our toys, our smartphones, our pets. Once we got to call something “mine”, we slowly fell in love with it. We wanted to have it in our hands forever, prevent it from breaking or decaying, and take it with us wherever we go.
As adults, we often find that we continue to do the same to the things that capture our hearts. When something is “precious” to us, we struggle to let it go, to let it be outside of our control. Unfortunately, this idea has seeped into our notion of love, too. We love someone, but we don’t want them to go. We say that we love them, but we hinder them from growing. We might say we love them, but maybe we’re just afraid of losing someone so precious to us.
“If you love a flower, don’t pick it up. Because if you pick it up it dies… So if you love a flower, let it be. Love is not about possession. Love is about appreciation.” – Osho
Love does not equal to possession. Just like flowers, people are in a constant state of growth. Real love is supporting one another as we walk in our own journeys. If we have a spirit of release, we give our partners the freedom to flourish, releasing them to reach the highest of their potential.
Genuine love sprouts out of neither fear nor selfishness. Instead, love is the desire to see someone else thrive and live their best lives.