We are never without problems. Oh, how we wish our days were filled with rainbows and sparkly unicorns, but we can’t always see through rose-colored glasses. There are days when storms hit and our days are filled with darkness. Problems, in family relationships, are normal. They’re no fun and can overwhelm us, but they’re perfectly normal. It can drain our energy, affect every aspects of our lives, and throw us off our rhythm, but they’re perfectly normal. But the great news is that they never last. They can be solved. And they can go away.
Problems can hit one person within the family, or just the parents, or even the kids. But no matter who is going through a hard time, everyone in the family will go through it too, because that’s what families are, a unit. If a couple is having problems in their marriage, their children will be troubled as a result of it. If a husband is feeling insecure about financial provisions, for example, his wife and his children will be affected by it. If a mother isn’t feeling physically capable or that her heart is in a mess, her entire home will not feel peace. Families go through everything together – even when you choose to turn a blind eye, or to shield other members of your family from it, everyone will feel an impact.
We wish problems upon no one, but since they are inevitable, we would like to share a few things that we’ve learned about braving through a stormy weather within the family. For the sake of discussion, let’s stay on the topic of problems that puts a stress on our relationship as a couple – be it marital, financial, social, or even physical ones.
- Get help
Marriage is the founding pillar of a family. When a marriage is failing, so will the family. When you feel the stress on your relationship as a couple as a result of a problem you are going through, get. Open up to a trustworthy friend who can help you both, or seek professional assistance. You can try to solve it among the two of you first, but if you’re nowhere near the end, a little outside perspective can help you a lot.
- Involve your children
Although it would feel like the most natural thing to shield your children from your problems, depending on their maturity, it would be good to bring them up to speed on what you’re going through. Don’t keep them in the dark; instead open up and let them in. As you share your burdens, you acknowledge them as a part of your family, and they might just be the comfort that you didn’t know you needed.
Families are like a giant tree whose branches are reaching out for the sky. It’s so much more than just the husband, the wife, the parents, or even the children. It’s all of us collectively. The way we see hardships should be that way too – a communal problem, something that our family is unified against. When we view challenges as something that we can tackle as a team, we create the sense that it’s “us against the world” and you’ll know that no matter what happens, you will be okay.