I come from a complicated and dysfunctional family. I’m not proud of it. And I don’t really want to go in detail about it, because frankly speaking, I really wouldn’t know where to start.
If you happen to think that I lead a perfect life, you’re sadly mistaken. I’m not a perfect person. Nobody is. And I don’t have a perfect marriage. In fact, I don’t think that anyone does.
I believe that there are no perfect marriage, but there can be a happy one. And I believe that there are no perfect families, but there can be a happy one, and that begins with two people who continues to learn and adjust and improve for the sake of their happiness together.
I know exactly what divorce can do to a child. I’ve been there. I know how uncomfortable and insecure a child can be after her parents split up. And so I have made a promise to myself to never let my children go through what I went through. But it wasn’t until I got married that I found out just how hard marriage is (LOL!) What’s easy is to pass judgements on other people’s marriage and to talk about what’s wrong with it or what they can do to improve it. But when you’re going through it yourself… well, it’s no picnic! However, I have learned that the key to a happy marriage is to be grateful for all things - everything and anything in between - and to put God in the center of my marriage. When I obey His commands, I am able to enjoy my marriage. Not survive it. Not hanging on. But actually enjoying it.
A good marriage is one that is built with harmony and intimacy, and those are things that don’t come naturally on its own. We need to work for it. It takes a lot of effort and a lot of hard work and there’s nothing instant about it. But when we decide that we want to do it, we can actually get there.
The thing is this: You are not defined by your past. You are defined by the choices you make today. If you had a great past, you can still have an even better future. I’m not saying that it will be easy, but I’m saying that you can. It all depends on the choices you make today.
Your decision impacts your future. And when you’re a parent, your decision impacts your children’s future. A strong marriage is a foundation for a strong family.